What would you say to yourself right now? Are you mentally strong? Are you becoming easily affected by what people say, and do you take things personally, or you are more focused on yourself, how you feel about yourself, and what your intentions are?
It is very crucial to know whether you are mentally strong or not, because from that point, you can decide where you really wanna take yourself, and to what extent.
I will give you an example from my story, so you know what I think it is to be mentally strong. I was dating a guy who was telling me from the beginning that he doesn”t want a relationship with me, but despite of that, I was doing every possible things to make him change his plans with me. Trying to make him fall in love with me, and all kinds of things that women do. You don”t wanna go this path. Please, stop trying make people like you. That is very weak, which is opposite of being strong.
It drove me crazy. I could”t focus on my work, because I was thinking only about me, and him not caring about me as much as I would love to. We were breaking up couple of times, because I wanted to be clear about us and define where this is all going. I couldn”t except anything less than being committed with him.
Long story short, after our last breakup, not long after that, I start to miss this guy again, and I decided to get in contact with him again no matter what. I promised myself that I am not going to be hooked up again by my crazy ideas, and just have fun, like normal people do, and not planning anything for the future.
I really hope you understand the story and how easily we get affected by the emotions we feel, not realizing that we sabotage ourselves and our situations, making them bigger than what they really are.
“Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.” — Golda Meir Source
If something is going on in your life right now, know that you are bigger than that. I even printed on my sweater the quote: “I am bigger than this”. People loved to see the quotes on my sweater on the streets. 😀
If you want to be mentally strong, you must decide that you are not going to lead this life by being weak. Everybody can be mentally strong, and not being offended or affected by the things, people, or challenges around them.
Not long ago, I made a video about “How to not take things personally” that I think is closely related to this topic as well. Find the video below this paragraph. I think we often times give people our power, and naturally, they think they can do with us whatever they can. And it is true, until the day we decide to claim our power back, and do whatever it takes to be a masters of our lives again.
I can say for myself that I am right now mentally strong, but I wasn”t always like that. People was used to manipulating with me. My ex boyfriend as well, he was driving me crazy, again 😀 but that is what he wanted, right? Who can drive you crazy? The ones that you are going to react to, with same exact way. But if you react to that with a response, they usually loose their power and can”t affect you anymore.
There is a huge difference between reacting and responding. A reaction is typically quick, without much thought, tense and aggressive. A response is thought out, calm and non-threatening. A reaction typically provokes more reactions – perpetuating a long line of hatefulness with nothing accomplished.
I recently met a woman that had very schizophrenic behavior. Shortly after, she told me that she separated from her first husband, with 3 kids, and then she found a new boyfriend over internet who is in the jail at this moment, and her kids doesn”t talk with her. How destructive is that? People live all kinds of lives, yet they can”t handle what life throws at them.
You need to be stronger than your life”s hurdles. You need to say to yourself or to God, Universe, “Just throw at me, I will handle it no matter what”. And it is truly that, through this obstacles you really grow, you really expand, and become somebody who is really tough.
You want to be mentally strong, believe me. Don”t be easily offended, because hey, you are taking this life seriously. It is not that serious, believe me. Life is a game, and you are here to play that game, you get to decide what path to take, and it will always stay that way. You always have a choice.
“You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.” — Wayne Dyer
Those that are successful now, they”ve been through a lot more than we are. That is exactly why they are successful. You and me are just tip toeing through life, yet there are the ones that lost everything they had, but came back stronger than ever, mentally stronger than ever.
Many people beat themselves up, and that is not being mentally strong. Mentally strong is knowing, trusting, having faith in yourself and everything that you do. Why you and I are beating ourselves up, anyway? Because we are making excuses that we are not good enough I think, and that is so destructive. Why would you focus on what is not working instead of seeing what is working.? If you focus on the first, you are screwed, and you will get the more of what is not working.
SUMMARY
You will stay with you for the rest of your life. You better make this relationship with yourself work, because you cannot escape from yourself. People will come and go in your life, some will stay longer, some shorter, but you will have to deal with you all the time. Mentally strong is about knowing who you really are, and that there is no wrong path, only the path that you choose to take, and if it doesn”t work, change it.
Frau Diller 