Social Life

How to find new friends

We are social beings and we need interaction with other humans. Your life would not be meaningful without the people around you. Other people spice up our lives. They tell us stories, and make us laugh. We learn from each other.

Have you heard about the quote: “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”? People around us, our friends, are the reflection on ourselves. Like always attracts like.

Now, you might be thinking how to attract those new, better friends?

By you being good or better! You need to level up yourself. They are not going to come to you, if you are not yourself built up already. Would you go to a junkie right now, wanting to develop a relationship, and friendship with him? I doubt you would. Because, you and me, with a junkies, are on completely different level.

Don”t get me wrong. I don”t have nothing against junkies. This was just an example.

You need to be for what you want to become. Be, and you already are.

When most people set out to change their lives, they often focus on all the external stuff, like a new job or a new location or new friends or a new romantic prospects and on and on. The reality is that changing your life starts with changing the way you see everything in your life. Mark Manson
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/new-friends-quotes

Keep the old friends, those are gold, but also make a new one, these are silver, says Joseph Parry, and I truly believe that to be true. Why?

It is about the variety. You both influenced each other for years. Why would you let go of those friends after years of friendships? Even though you are not in contact with them anymore? You reach out to them first. Ask them how they are doing. Do whatever it takes to refresh the contact with them, if you want, of course.

And, on the contrary, it is ok if two people split. They both go different direction. Make your own best decision, and stick to it.

Friends are gold.

Our best memories are around the people.

If I asked you right now what are some of your best memories, I believe you are going to be saying, around the people that you love, your gatherings, celebrations…etc.

No wonder, because this is life. Making memories with the people that you love is precious. Take good care of them, and they are gonna be taking good care of you. Be really interested about the people that are surrounding you, your family and friends.

How to find new friends:

  1. Sign up for Meetup.com and attend meetings of your interest
  2. Invite friends of the friends to the parties and meetings
  3. Have a conversations with strangers (when appropriate)
  4. Connect with people online, ask questions, give compliments
  5. Be kind (kindness is the new currency)
  6. Introduce yourself
  7. Be outgoing and nonchalant
  8. Be interested in others
  9. Expect nothing from others, but give your all
  10. Boost your confidence
  11. Be your own best friend first

There are countless of books on this subject, same as Youtube videos. Answers are there, you just need to find them. And take those answers that best suits you, and your current situation.

The best book about how to be your own best friend that I highly recommend.

What is real, lasting happiness? How does one achieve it? And why are so many people holding themselves back? At the heart of this profound, simple, beautiful book is the wisdom of Mildred Newman and Bernard Berkowitz, married psychoanalysts who encourage readers to both love themselves and to confront life’s hardest truths. A classic for more than three decades, How to Be Your Own Best Friend has already changed millions of lives. Now, open up your mind, and let it change yours.

Praise for How to Be Your Own Best Friend

Friends fo
Friends for life.

Now, I know that this may sound counterintuitive, but hear me out.

You are with yourself your whole life.

You need to be good with you first, in order to find good friends, friends for life, those that are going to stick with you forever.

The first step to becoming a friend to yourself, is to treat yourself like you would treat a friend. That means that you need to stop being self-critical and beating yourself up. Start by acknowledging your good qualities, talents and abilities and begin to appreciate your own unique self. Source

Nobody wants to be treated badly, and so do you. Would you stay in a relationship with a person who is always criticises you? Of course you wouldn”t! So stop to criticise yourself, and stop beating yourself up. You need to love and appreciate yourself first, to have healthy relationships with other people.

Do you have any thoughts on this so far? What are some of the places that you met your new friends? Common or uncommon. We would greatly appreciate that, as it will give us a hope. So share with us, please.

How to win friends and influence people is another great book that thought me how to treat others in a more influential and positive kind of way. So much so, that I had to write a Blog Post on this. 😀 You can read it HERE.

People are craving for human connection.

I truly believe, people are craving for human connection now more than ever. That”s probably because of this technology times. We are in front of our computers and televisions all the time.

So don”t be afraid to reach out to other human. We”ve been all craving that. I know I do. And I believe you do too.

Is there anything better than have a blast with couple of your friends, with good music, food and dance? I don”t think so. So go out and make some friends. Don”t forget to have a fun with it.

We wish you all the best.

Sincerely,

Maja.

 

 

Advertisement
#attitude

Cut The Crap And Feel Amazing

Many people let other people and the circumstances to let them down. Why is that? Because they think that is normal. It is normal to take whatever someone is saying to you, but is it really true? No! Cut the crap that doesn”t serve you, that doesn”t uplift you, and that doesn”t make you feel good.

Life is too short to dance how other people make music. You should be able to make your own music, and dance, make the moves as best as you can and know how.

These are the ways on how you might be taking the crap in your life you don”t even realizing it:

  • You feel bad in certain environment, stressful or nervous

I was working at the restaurant that was far from my house and I asked for the transfer in another same restaurant chain, the one closest to my house. As soon as I arrived, I realized that this is going to be a challenge for me. A management that didn”t know how to lead, the restaurant location was very busy, unorganized staff, and the worst of all, the manager was telling me every day things like: “Why you had to come here, I didn”t want you or need you!” I felt terrible, but I knew that this is not because of me, it was her. She was the one who was going through some stuff in her own personal life.

  • People that you are seeing doesn”t make you feel good, you feel drained after speaking with them

I knew plenty of people that just wasn”t for me. I remember a guy that I met in a bus. We were both listening music and enjoying it. At one point our eyes met, and then we started to talk. We were seeing each other after that, but soon after I realized that he was too pushy. He was acting like he is the most handsome guy in the entire world, and he wanted to be seen with me wherever we go. I just wanted to be natural, I wanted to be me.

One day when we were walking through the town, and he had his important talking moment, I just turned around and left the opposite direction. He tried to follow me home, but I was determined  to end up this relationship. Since then, I felt like new born.

Cut the crap people from your life. People that doesn”t make you feel good, people that drain your energy, people that doesn”t really ask you how you feel, and people that always want something from you, other than you. Life is too short to have those people around you.

  • You feel like a crap, your emotions are very low

I felt bad most of my life, I admit it. And I started to feel amazing the day when I got really tired of feeling bad about myself and my life. I decided to feel amazing, and guess what, it feels amazing to find the amazing in this amazing life. haha You know what I mean?

Not all the time you will feel amazing once you decide to do so. For example, two nights ago I was drinking, and the day after I felt terrible, had a headache and the zero energy. All day long I spent in my bed, doing nothing, just sleeping. Of course I felt bad, and the worst of all I beat myself up for that. Now that I am feeling much better, I am asking myself why I just couldn”t relax, and enjoy my sick moments, instead I beat myself up.

We are always going to go through some “stuff” and that is ok, that is life. Life is roller coaster, up and down, it is not a straight line. As much as you try to find the good in everything, you will find the good in everything. The question is: “How hard are you willing to work for that?”

 

  • Job that you are working at is not satisfying to you, zero joy

Say stop. We are trading our precious time for that unsatisfying job. Life is too short to give our time to the people and company that we don”t believe in. And that is true! The moment you realize that you don”t like it, and that you feel scared of being at the same job all your life, should be motivating to you.

I am going through the same. I always wanted to be an entrepreneur. And I started some entrepreneurship endeavors years ago, but it didn”t work, and I quit. I started again couple of years ago to do the things that I really like to do, scale it, build it, and then work on that full time. But I still work for somebody else, and that is O.K., it is not going to last forever, I will build it now, and never give up.

If you are at the job that doesn”t motivate you, commit to finding a better one. For example, I breathe and live entrepreneurship before and after my actual job. You can do the same. Everyday go to job marketplaces and look for the job that is better for you than the one you currently have. If you don”t have an education for that, go and sign up for the school, either online or physically. I guarantee you, if you are going to look for the better, you will find the better.

When it comes to finding better job, job that suits you, in case you don”t know yet what should you go for, try different jobs. I changed plenty of jobs. None of them satisfied me enough. Why? Because I wanted to be free, I wanted to be fully creative. For me, entrepreneurship was the only way.

Repeat after me: “That was the last year of tolerating less than I deserve!”

  • Complaining

Why do we complain? Why humans complain? Is it because we are not taking full responsibility for our lives or what? Because hey, if you take extreme ownership of your life, there is no room for complaining. You know that you created everything what is going on around you.

Complaining is such a waste of energy and time. Instead of thinking happy thoughts and planning your amazing future, you complain of the dirty kitchen floor. Big no-no! Who cares about the floor?! Go and focus on creating your dream future.

What do you think? What are some of the craps that you need to eliminate from your life, that grabs your attention from the things that you really want for yourself, family, and friends?