Social Life

Setting boundaries

Setting boundaries are crucial to have a good relationships. You can set boundaries at work, to your closest family, in friendships..

Boundaries are when you show or tell people how you want to be treated, how they need to interact with you, in your relationship with your partner-who does what, when, and where, to everything work smoothly. You can also set boundaries to your kids such as: knocking on your bedroom door before entering, you want their homework to be done by some certain time, no violence in the house.. It is a set of rules!

Let’s find out

Every household should have their set of rules. Only by having rules in the house, in partnership, everything can work out smoothly, otherwise, things can get out of control. What do you think?

Make sure to set healthy boundaries

People often set boundaries just to protect themselves, and that is O.K., because they must’ve been hurt in the past, and don’t want to be hurt again. But, if you set boundaries just to protect yourself, be careful not to build walls, because if you build walls, you might not let the good stuff coming in, if that makes sense.

Hare are

Boundaries should be agreed from both sides. One should come up to boundary, and the other should agree upon that, it has to be mutual, in order for relationship to expand. That is the whole purpose to boundaries, for relationships to expand and thrive.

I will never forget when I was watching a podcast and the woman there was talking about her romantic relationship and how this relationship works perfectly fine. She was saying that when she met a guy, she explained her situation saying that she is not going to tolerate alcohol if the end up together, and the other two things that I can’t remember now.

Basically, she didn’t like her father how he was acting and what was he doing, and she want a man in her life complete opposite, she knew exactly what she wanted, and that is why she got it, because she asked for it. So the lesson here is to be clear about what you want and communicate that.

Whatever you are willing to put up with, is exactly what you will have. -Anonymous

I liked the blog post from @happilylover about setting boundaries. Read it here:

Many people think if we set boundaries we will act like a boss, treat people like they are our servants or so, but that is far from the truth. It is only the things that you know you can’t tolerate in the relationshipy, and that should be clear to both parties.

To ste healthy boundaries talk clearly, with soft voice, try to find win-win situation, be polite, easy to talk to…really, it is not that hard, and they will look at you with different eyes, treat you with respect, I assure you.

Social Life

How to find new friends

We are social beings and we need interaction with other humans. Your life would not be meaningful without the people around you. Other people spice up our lives. They tell us stories, and make us laugh. We learn from each other.

Have you heard about the quote: “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”? People around us, our friends, are the reflection on ourselves. Like always attracts like.

Now, you might be thinking how to attract those new, better friends?

By you being good or better! You need to level up yourself. They are not going to come to you, if you are not yourself built up already. Would you go to a junkie right now, wanting to develop a relationship, and friendship with him? I doubt you would. Because, you and me, with a junkies, are on completely different level.

Don”t get me wrong. I don”t have nothing against junkies. This was just an example.

You need to be for what you want to become. Be, and you already are.

When most people set out to change their lives, they often focus on all the external stuff, like a new job or a new location or new friends or a new romantic prospects and on and on. The reality is that changing your life starts with changing the way you see everything in your life. Mark Manson

Keep the old friends, those are gold, but also make a new one, these are silver, says Joseph Parry, and I truly believe that to be true. Why?

It is about the variety. You both influenced each other for years. Why would you let go of those friends after years of friendships? Even though you are not in contact with them anymore? You reach out to them first. Ask them how they are doing. Do whatever it takes to refresh the contact with them, if you want, of course.

And, on the contrary, it is ok if two people split. They both go different direction. Make your own best decision, and stick to it.

Friends are gold.

Our best memories are around the people.

If I asked you right now what are some of your best memories, I believe you are going to be saying, around the people that you love, your gatherings, celebrations…etc.

No wonder, because this is life. Making memories with the people that you love is precious. Take good care of them, and they are gonna be taking good care of you. Be really interested about the people that are surrounding you, your family and friends.

How to find new friends:

  1. Sign up for and attend meetings of your interest
  2. Invite friends of the friends to the parties and meetings
  3. Have a conversations with strangers (when appropriate)
  4. Connect with people online, ask questions, give compliments
  5. Be kind (kindness is the new currency)
  6. Introduce yourself
  7. Be outgoing and nonchalant
  8. Be interested in others
  9. Expect nothing from others, but give your all
  10. Boost your confidence
  11. Be your own best friend first

There are countless of books on this subject, same as Youtube videos. Answers are there, you just need to find them. And take those answers that best suits you, and your current situation.

The best book about how to be your own best friend that I highly recommend.

What is real, lasting happiness? How does one achieve it? And why are so many people holding themselves back? At the heart of this profound, simple, beautiful book is the wisdom of Mildred Newman and Bernard Berkowitz, married psychoanalysts who encourage readers to both love themselves and to confront life’s hardest truths. A classic for more than three decades, How to Be Your Own Best Friend has already changed millions of lives. Now, open up your mind, and let it change yours.

Praise for How to Be Your Own Best Friend

Friends fo
Friends for life.

Now, I know that this may sound counterintuitive, but hear me out.

You are with yourself your whole life.

You need to be good with you first, in order to find good friends, friends for life, those that are going to stick with you forever.

The first step to becoming a friend to yourself, is to treat yourself like you would treat a friend. That means that you need to stop being self-critical and beating yourself up. Start by acknowledging your good qualities, talents and abilities and begin to appreciate your own unique self. Source

Nobody wants to be treated badly, and so do you. Would you stay in a relationship with a person who is always criticises you? Of course you wouldn”t! So stop to criticise yourself, and stop beating yourself up. You need to love and appreciate yourself first, to have healthy relationships with other people.

Do you have any thoughts on this so far? What are some of the places that you met your new friends? Common or uncommon. We would greatly appreciate that, as it will give us a hope. So share with us, please.

How to win friends and influence people is another great book that thought me how to treat others in a more influential and positive kind of way. So much so, that I had to write a Blog Post on this. 😀 You can read it HERE.

People are craving for human connection.

I truly believe, people are craving for human connection now more than ever. That”s probably because of this technology times. We are in front of our computers and televisions all the time.

So don”t be afraid to reach out to other human. We”ve been all craving that. I know I do. And I believe you do too.

Is there anything better than have a blast with couple of your friends, with good music, food and dance? I don”t think so. So go out and make some friends. Don”t forget to have a fun with it.

We wish you all the best.